Selfishness and Love

Selfishness and love. Not too often does someone speak of these two words jointly. In many cases in life, although they are opposites, selfishness and love go hand in hand.

Selfishness is focused on satisfying its own flesh while Love is focused on pleasing others.

So is it possible for someone to be selfish and still love wholeheartedly? The answer is no. Here’s why…

The breakdown

LOVE: The bible explains different facets of love. The simplest of understandings (and most commonly known) is in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NIV), Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

SELFISHNESS: According to the gospel, selfishness (and pride… since they have similar traits) only causes trouble and dissonance. God sees this as sinful and those who partake in it will not inherit His Kingdom.

1 John 2:16 (CEV) Our foolish pride comes from this world, and so do our selfish desires and our desire to have everything we see. None of this comes from the Father.

Proverbs 13:10 (CEV)
Too much pride causes trouble.
Be sensible and take advice

Proverbs 18:1 (NIV)
An unfriendly man pursues selfish ends; he defies all sound judgment.

So how does selfishness affect love?

In being selfish, people usually mistreat other people because of their own feelings. There is more emphasis on "me" or "my" or "I" as opposed to taking the other into consideration. With that as a foundation, they cannot really love… TRULY LOVE… someone else because of their over abundance of self-love. In other words, this "self love" doesn’t allow a person to love entirely because they’re feeding a selfish pride instead.

Solution or Resolution (if you will):

The bible tells us to love one another as God has loved us
(John 13:34).
The bible tells us to be devoted to and honor one another
(Romans 12:10).
The bible tells us to have concern for one another
(1 Corinthians 12:25).

We are instructed to humble ourselves before the Lord so that we may move in life with an abundance of humility, respect, love, and understanding towards one another. In order to achieve this, we must first be fair with ourselves… set our path on His ways, not the ways of the selfish and prideful. After all, if we are not fair to ourselves then we will have a hard time being fair to others.

Philippians 2:3 (NIV) Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.

James 3:17 (NIV) But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere

We must all take the time to re-evaluate ourselves. Where do we fall short? What are our inequities? Do these shortcomings impact others? If so, how? And, most importantly, have we brought these to the Lord??

Find refuge in the Lord and He will bring you past these weaknesses. He will continue to transform you into a creature of light and wonderment; a child of God. Your growth, humility, respect, love, and understanding will pour out from within, embracing all whom you reach.

The Devil & the Duck

A chain email with a good messsage...

There was a little boy visiting his grandparents on their farm.

He was given a slingshot to play with out in the woods.

He practiced in the woods; but he could never hit the target.

Getting a little discouraged, he headed back for dinner.

As he was walking back he saw Grandma's pet duck.

Just out of impulse, he let the slingshot fly, hit the duck square in the head and killed it. He was shocked and grieved!

In a panic, he hid the dead duck in the wood pile; only to see his
Sister watching! Sally had seen it all, but she said nothing.

After lunch the next day Grandma said, 'Sally, let's wash the dishes'

But Sally said, 'Grandma, Johnny told me he wanted to help in the kitchen.'

Then she whispered to him, 'Rem em ber the duck?'

So Johnny did the dishes.

Later that day, Grandpa asked if the children wanted to go fishing and Grandma said, 'I'm sorry but I need Sally to help make supper.'

Sally just smiled and said, 'well that's all right because Johnny told me he wanted to help?

She whispered again, 'Remember the duck?' So Sally went fishing and Johnny stayed to help.

After several days of Johnny doing both his chores and Sally's; he
Finally couldn't stand it any longer.

He came to Grandma and confessed that he had killed the duck.

Grandma knelt down, gave him a hug and said, 'Sweetheart, I know. You see, I was standing at the window and I saw the whole thing, but because I love you, I forgave you. I was just wondering how long you would let Sally make a slave of you.'


Thought for the day and every day thereafter:

Whatever is in your past, whatever you have done... And the devil keeps throwing it up in your face (lying, cheating, debt, fear, bad habits, hatred, anger, bitterness, etc.)...whatever it is... you need to know that:

God was standing at the window and He saw the whole thing.
"For the ways of man are before the eyes of the Lord." (Proverbs 5:21)

He has seen your whole life. He wants you to know that He loves you and that you are forgiven. He's just wondering how long you will let the devil make a slave of you.

The great thing about God is that when you ask for forgiveness;

He not only forgives you, but He forgets.
"…and will not remember thy sins." (Isaiah 43:25)
"I will remember their sin no more." (Jeremiah 31:34)
"Their sins and their iniquities will I remember no more." (Hebrews 8:12)

It is by God's grace and mercy that we are saved.
to give his people the knowledge of salvation
through the forgiveness of their sins,
because of the tender mercy of our God,
by which the rising sun will come to us from heaven. (Luke 1:77-78)


Always remember:

God is at the window!

When Jesus died on the cross; he was thinking of you!
For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. (John 3:16)